My wish for all of you ...

Dearest girls,

This Christmas, I wish for you ...

... a renewed appreciation for the gift of Him.

... happy times with friends and family.

... cozy days with a blanket, something hot to drink and a good book.

... many opportunities to bless others as you continually bless me.

Lots of love,

bev

see you after Christmas

One of those Weeks ...

Have you ever had one of those "off" weeks? I am having one this week. For example, today I attempted to make bread as I try to do once a week. I let the dough rise, and punched it down. Then I shaped it into loaves and let it rise again. It looked delicious and smelled even better. However, when I opened the oven to look at my masterpiece, it had risen to an almost gargantuan size. It was ruined.

One thing after another seemed to happen today, and I must admit that I was getting discouraged! Its been a tough week - you can read more about that at my other blog.

What should I have done? I should have stopped and prayed. I should have remembered Isaiah 40:31. I should have whispered Galatians 6:9 to myself.

What did I do? I am ashamed to say that I hid. I put Lena in her crib with a basket of books for quiet time, and I ran downstairs to wrap myself in my cozy blanket. It was only after I spent 10 minutes stewing about all the things that needed to be done, that I remembered...

To pray.
To ask forgiveness from the Lord.
To recall His promises.
To laugh at myself.
To fold up that blanket and start tackling the things I needed to do.

So my dear sister - friends, as you deal with schoolwork, other commitments, difficulties and trials, remember to reflect on His promises. He is faithful.

May We Praise Him

Wishing all of you a happy thanksgiving.

We will be busy the next few days. I must clean from top to bottom today. Tomorrow we head to relatives to celebrate with them, and friday we are having a friendly football game between the men of our church and another. Everyone is then coming to our house. Saturday I hope to take down all my fall decorations and put up winter ones.

What are you doing this weekend?

The Garden of Friendship - Gossip

I think that as women, one of our biggest sins is misuse of our mouths. Whether you are by nature talkative or quiet, you may deal with the temptation to gossip with your friends and aquaintances. So many times I recall a conversation I had and wonder, "was that gossip?"

Will you join me in reflecting on a few points that may help us with this tendency? I need this too!

1. Gossip may often be disguised as, "we need to pray for ..." Using the need for prayer as a reason to talk about someone else's personal business is not okay. I know I have done this, and I am heartily ashamed. There are times when it is legitimate to bring up a situation as a prayer request. Pray that God will give you wisdom in this matter.

2. Be a secret keeper. It is sooooo easy to "let it slip." When friends tell you something in confidence, carefully guard their information. I would like to add that it is okay to let a secret out is when someone tells you something that could seriously harm them. We shouldn't glibly promise to keep a secret when we know we can't. In that situation, it is proper to inform the person that if they do not share their information with someone they trust, you may have to. "A talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter." Prov 11:13

3. Gossip is sinful. This sin is not to be taken lightly. Our speech is to be always with grace, seasoned with salt. (Col 4:6) Is what we are saying helpful and edifying? Does it lift another up or tear down?

4. Be humble. Don't be afraid to go back after having an unwise conversation and apologize to the friend you had it with. This is pleasing to God, and it may help your friends to think twice before giving in to gossip. "The words of a talebearer are like tasty trifles, and they go down into the inmost body." Prov 26:22

Any other thoughts on this subject? I could go on and on, but time doesn't permit. How do you avoid gossip?

Pumpkin Bread Recipe

Sorry I have taken so long to post and to update myself on your lovely blogs. For some reason, our laptop has suddenly decided not to work on our network. Until we get that fixed, I can't be online as much because I'd be sitting in our office all day and not getting anything else accomplished!

I wanted to share a recipe with you.

I just made this, and believe me -- it is soooooo yummy! The best thing about this recipe is that you can eat some and still have plenty to share!

This yields 3 loaves ...

Here's what you need:

3 cups white sugar
4 eggs
2/3 cup water
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon ground allspice
3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 teaspoons salt
1 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1 (15 ounce) can pumpkin puree
1 cup chopped walnuts
1 cup raisins
1 cup vegetable oil

I always make my breads without raisins and nuts, but it is still super yummy.

Here's what you do -- so easy!

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease and flour three 7 x 3 inch loaf pans.
Mix oil, sugar, and eggs together in a large bowl. Mix in pumpkin puree and water. Stir together flour, soda, baking powder, salt, and spices. Add to the pumpkin mixture, and mix until just combined. Stir in nuts and raisins. Divide batter into prepared pans.
Bake for 1 hour. Cool on wire racks.

I got some foil pans at the store so I could give a couple of loaves away, and they took about 15 minutes longer to cook. Check the bread after an hour and make sure it's done.

Recipe from allrecipes.com

The Garden of Friendship - Helping Others

This is more of a thank you post then an exhortation! Some of you I know personally, and others I know from "blog-land." I have seen the servant's hearts that you have.

One of the ways that we can be good friends is to find little helpful things to do that will make our friend's lives easier.

This post is about my sister, but of course she is my friend as well.

Right now, hubby is very busy and has to be away overnight at times. This is a difficult season for our little family even though it is temporary. I don't like being home alone overnight, and our little daughter misses her Daddy and is sad when he isn't there to tuck her in. We know that he is doing this for the good of our whole family and that it is hard for him too. We only have eight weeks left - Yippee!! God has been faithful as always.

But I digress. My sister has been sweet enough to come over and stay with us when hubby is away. This makes life very happy and we look forward to our "girlie" weekends. I don't know how she puts up with Selena saying "hi dee-dee" over and over and over. And over.

see the smile on Lena's face?

So thank you so much Neesie, for helping us through this season of life. We are going to have so much fun pumpkin picking tomorrow.

Sixteenth Birthday Party

I wanted to share with you the idea of a Proverbs 31 birthday party. My parents had one for me when I turned sixteen, and the effects were far reaching.


Unbeknownst to me, each invited guest was to give me a gift based on one of the verses in Proverbs 31:10-31. Each gift was to be for my hopechest, and was to be saved for the future (for marriage if God so blessed me).

I still have the cards and gifts that were given to me ...

For example:
verse 15 "She also rises while it is yet night ..." I received a beautiful porcelain clock.
verse 16 "She considers a field and buys it..." I recieved a lovely couch throw with embroidered seed packets on it.
verse 18 "... her lamp does not go out by night." I received an elegant crystal lamp, and two pairs of candlesticks -- one brass and one crystal.
verse 21 "...for all her household is clothed with scarlet. She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple." I received some absolutely lovely purple material and a sewing box.

These are just some of the things I received on that birthday. I also received a gorgeous apron, some cookbooks, vases, and even a set of dishes! It was such a surprise - I knew about the party but not the Proverbs 31/hopechest theme.

Everyone wrote out the verse that they were representing with their gift, and a note to me. These things are reflected all around my home today. People kept up with the theme for future gifts for me also.

When I got married, it was so exciting to take out each carefully wrapped item and show my husband the things I had saved for our future home. I also remember that when we had secured an apartment that we would live in, and my mom and I went to start cleaning and moving in, that I was able to decorate with table scarves, candles and doilies right away.

Do you have any memorable party ideas? If so, leave it in a comment or email me at joyousmommie@girlinside.com.

How God Brought Us Together - Part Three

Ecclesiastes 4:12 A cord of three strands is not easily broken.


"A threefold cord is not easily broken, any more than a bundle of arrows, though each single thread and each single arrow is. Two together he compares to a threefold cord; for where two are closely joined in holy love and fellowship, Christ will by His spirit come to them, and make the third, as He joined Himself to the two disciples going to Emmaus, and then there is a threefold cord that can never be broken. They that dwell in love, dwell in God and God in them."
-Matthew Henry-(the above is an excerpt from our wedding program)

It was Saturday the 25th of September 2004. At one o' clock in the afternoon, an expectant groom walked to the front of the sanctuary to await his bride.

He watched and waited as two violins and a piano played Canon in D as the mothers were seated, and Largo from Xerxes as the beautiful bridesmaids walked down the aisle.

The four flower girls were led by the ringbearer and then ...
... the doors were closed.

All rose as the bride and her father approached.

All in the wedding party sat as a charge was given to the couple. The congregation joined in singing O the Deep Deep Love of Jesus and Take My Life and Let it Be.

Vows were spoken, rings were exchanged, prayer was given for the couple, and their union was pronounced.



They couldn't seem to wipe the happy grins from their faces.


Were they really married? So much joy wasn't possible, was it?

They walked arm in arm into the reception, held in the very same room where they met.

When it was time to go, the bride shed a few tears as she said goodbye to her family, but quickly shook them away to leave with her new husband.

Near disaster was averted as the impatient groom almost caused a fender bender.

The newlyweds rode off into the sunset. They didn't realize that they could love each other any more then they did at that moment...

... but they do.

How God Brought Us Together - Part Two (x-post from my other blog)

THE SUMMER COURTSHIP
The days of summer progressed, and so did our relationship with one another. The emails continued, but they got shorter because we were talking so much. The calls got more frequent, and we began to see each other every weekend.

We started to pray together. Mr S emailed me a list of items to pray for.

We also started reading two Christian books which Mr. S purchased for me. We started to talk about the future. We were surprised how closely God was knitting our hearts. I think we all just knew.

He had not confessed his love for me, although he made sure I knew how he felt. He always talked about how red roses meant love, and he knew that I loved roses. On the day before my birthday a vase stuffed with beautiful red roses and other filler flowers arrived at my house. The card read: "Red!!! What does that mean? I forget. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow."

When he asked my Dad if he could officially court me, my Dad gave his consent readily (after a serious conversation of course!). He became a part of our small family and I became a part of his big family.

ENGAGEMENT

On October 17, 2003, I was supposed to go spend the weekend in Mr.S's neck of the woods. I was going to a birthday party for his cousin. This was my first time spending an overnight in North Jersey.

I noticed that Mom said "I love you," to Mr S when we were walking down the driveway, but I didn't think anything of it.

We went past the exit we were supposed to turn off on, and when I asked about it, I was assured that "we could go this way too." He pulled into Liberty State Park and I was enjoying the lit up buildings ... it was beautiful. I was fine until he pulled into a parking lot and stopped the car. He asked me if I wanted to take a walk. I wasn't sure what he was doing. We always discussed everything we did before we did it. We always cleared everything with my dad too. I told him that I didn't want to take a walk. He was shocked! He said that he needed to stretch his legs and after he walked around and got his jacket out of the trunk, he told me that there was something he wanted to show me. I was uncomfortable (spontaneity is not my strong point), but I went. We walked onto the bridge and he showed me the Statue of Liberty. It was breathtaking in the dusk.

Then I felt a drop land on my nose.

"It's raining," I announced.

"It's not," he said quickly.

"Bev, your parents know we're here," he finally said, sensing my inner thoughts.

"They do?" I said, ready to cry with relief, "why didn't you tell me that?"

"Because it was supposed to be a surprise," he answered smiling down at me.

We started to walk along the bridge hand in hand. He stopped and told me that he wished he could show me how much he loved me.

I started to realize at that moment what was going on.

He told me that he was going to show me, and next thing I knew, he was down on one knee in front of me. He was holding a ring in the air ... it was sparkling in the overhead lights.I don't remember what I said. It was an indescribable feeling.

But yes --- we still had to attend the birthday party. So we got back in the car -- we were both giddy, and drove to his house. When I walked in, my parents and my sister and his family and some friends were there! It wasn't a birthday party but an engagement party for us. It was a perfect ending.

The next morning, we went to breakfast at a friend's house. There, we saw our two friends who had gotten engaged the very same night! Mr.S and the other guy - the very same one who had alerted Mr.S to sit at our table at the banquet - had planned all this to perfection. We got engaged simultaneously, and not far in location from one another. You can imagine what a gleeful breakfast this was.

By the way, we also got married within three months of each other and had our first children within three months of each other. We are currently planning their wedding:-) They beat us with the second child though, theirs is due in just a few weeks!

That night, we went to The Manor for dinner. A wedding was going on outside and we sat at a distance and dreamed and planned about us.

Thus ends my narrative about the courtship and engagement.I think I will post about the wedding on September 25th as that is our actual anniversary. And yes, I'll include a few pictures.

How God Brought Us Together Part One (x-post from my other blog)

Girls, I thought this might be an encouragement for you to read. I posted it on my other blog in honor of our upcoming anniversary. I hope to post other similar stories in the future. I know it is wonderful to hear how God can work in bringing people together!

Well, I've almost been married for three years now. In one sense, it seems like it has gone so quickly, but in another, it feels like I have been married to Mr.S for my whole life!We grew up in the same state, and in sister churches. We were familiar with one another's families, but had never met. His uncle had preached at our church several times, and his cousin had attended my church for several years before moving away. I had taught her kids in Sunday School and we were very friendly.So how did God make us aware of each other?

WHERE WE MET

We met at an annual Spring Banquet at Trinity Baptist Church in Montville NJ. Neither of us were that excited about going. He had been to them so many times, and I always feel apprehensive about trying new things!At the banquet, I was sitting with four other friends from church, when his friend told him that he had to go to our table and meet me.He ended up sitting at our table and staying there! He didn't talk to me too much, and I was too occupied to notice that he was staring at me the entire time. Once, he flashed a brilliant smile at me, and I remember thinking, "what a nice smile."I left with my friends, and when asked by my dad if I had met Pastor Brevard's nephew at the banquet, I said "Yes -- he sat at our table! He was very nice."My dad pressed a little further, "did he seem interested at all?""No, but he was very nice," was my reply.

HIS COUSIN CALLS MY MOM

A week later, I was on lunch break at JoAnn Fabrics examining material when I got a call on my cell phone. It was my mom telling me that Mr. S's cousin had called her, saying that her cousin was interested in getting to know Beverly. I was astonished. She said that she had been urging him to meet me for a few years at least, and that we had finally "providentially" met on our own."But he didn't even talk to me!" I marvelled.THE LONG WAIT
Of course, this whole phone call triggered many dinner time conversations, introspections, talks with those that knew him, and talks with my Heavenly Father.
I was struggling because I knew that since I was 22, and he was 25 -- this could be very serious. This could mean marriage. I wanted to be absolutely willing for the relationship to lead to marriage before even starting to communicate.
It was a month later, when I called his cousin back. I realized that it had been a l-o-n-g time, and I didn't even know if he was still interested. His cousin didn't tell me one way or another, but questioned me for quite a while about how things were going in my life, and what God was . I gave her my email address and sighed with relief. I didn't know that Mr.S had nearly given up, and was ready to move on. God has perfect timing!

YOU'VE GOT MAIL

Three days later, I heard from Mr. S by email for the first time. I was so excited. I wrote him back that very day, but didn't send it until the next day.
Thus began our correspondance. He would write one day, and I would write the next. He never forgot, and neither did I. The emails were getting longer and longer. We had a lot in common. After we had written every day for two weeks, he slipped a question into the end of his email, "Hey, I was wondering if it would be okay if I called you sometime?"
I asked my parents and they said it was ok, so we planned to talk after evening service that next Sunday.

PHONE CALLS - LONG ONES

Our first phone call was wonderful. We talked for three hours. His phone died and he had to go get another one. In the middle of that call, Mr.S talked to my dad and asked him if he could call regularly. Dad said yes and said "don't abuse the privilege!" We decided that he would call on Sunday nights after church.
We continued to email every day, but the next Sunday night stretched far into the future. It was so hard to wait! On Friday night, the subject heading of his email read "sixty-nine hours and counting..."
We talked for three and a half hours the next time ... and then we started talking twice a week.
He asked me if he could come visit our church and home. Dad said yes.

THE VISIT

That Sunday as I taught Sunday School, I was so nervous. Through the window in my room, I saw him drive into the parking lot. I hardly knew what to do or how to act, but we had a wonderful day. He had dinner with our family and brought my mom a gift. He even helped us get dinner ready. I didn't want the day to end and I was starting to feel something very strange growing in my heart. Already? you may ask -- but when God is doing a work, our timing may not be His timing.
We wanted to see each other again, and my dad agreed that he could come five days later for the 4th of July. I was so excited, and so was he. His whole family was waiting at home to see how his day went, and I went home to discuss everything with my parents. I felt this strange sense of calm. I was so happy and excited, but it seemed so right -- something I had never felt before.

Thus ends part one ... part two will include: summer courtship, the engagement, marriage.

Seasonal Delights

I just had to share a new find with all of you.

We are about to enter my favorite season of the whole year! Imagine my delight when I bumped into a wonderful online magazine whose current issue is totally dedicated to the season of autumn.

Imagine my delight, when, upon further inspection, I saw that this very beautiful magazine is written for girls and their moms!

Also imagine my delight when two of the articles in the magazine were about letter/card writing, and having a tea party with your mom!

Delight is an apt word to use, for this colorful magazine is called Seasonal Delights and will be produced quarterly.

The best thing about all this, is that you can subscribe free for a year, if you hurry over there and subscribe before the end of September.

I really think that you and your mom will be delighted by this delightful magazine ;-)

I'll be back

Once again, I apologize for not posting. Our little family is very busy and has a lot going on, so I don't have too much time. I haven't forgotten you girls! I think of you so often, and will post as soon as I can.

Much love from me!

p.s. My little girl is one today! She is such a blessing to us.

The Garden of Friendship

Hello --- its about time to water those gardens again, is it not? Today I want to talk briefly about the listening ear.

Scenario set up:

You've waited for days to tell a close friend about an experience you went through. Finally, you know she is available so you give her a call. While you are talking, you notice that her answers aren't always appropriate to your statements. Listening to the background noise coming from the other end of the phone, you hear her fingers busily TYPING as you are talking. This isn't the best feeling!

I must admit that I have done this -- especially to my poor mom. We talk every morning on the phone, and sometimes we type in each other's ears. Sorry mom! But seriously, this is not a good habit to get into.

Another common problem that we have is thinking about our response while someone else is talking. This prevents us from truly listening the way we should.

Follow-up is another area of need. When a friend asks us for prayer, we shouldn't glibly say "I'll be praying!" I realized that I was typing this into many comment boxes on many blogs -- making it impossible to remember all the requests that I was promising to pray for. A simple notepad will solve this problem. Just write the name and request down, and you will be able to pray when you promise to. You will also remember to follow up on the request and see how the person is making out.

Try to practice listening this week. I will too! Girls, those gardens are lookin' great ...

It has been an emotional week!

Hello girls ...

I am sorry that I didn't get to post anything this week. Life has settled down considerably, but we had a couple of emotional things happen. Somehow I just didn't have the wherewithal to come up with a topic.

We have been rejoicing greatly with two of our dearest friends who found out that they were expecting in March. Beka and Charissa are sisters and I grew up with them.

Beka and her husband have been going through months of waiting on the Lord to bless her womb after a miscarriage a little more then a year and a half ago. She found out that she was pregnant about a month ago.

Charissa and her husband had already discovered that God had blessed her womb.

We were all wildly expectant for the two blessings due in March.

Please read this and secondly, this, post by Beka. Please join me in praying.

I posted this on my other blog after we found out about Charissa's miscarriage. The hymn I copied down has been such a blessing.

Thank you for being patient with me. I'll try to write something next week, as well as visit your individual blogs.

Lots of love.

I'll be back next week!

This is a very busy week for our little family! I'm not sure whether I am coming or going, so I'd better not try to post anything creative. I just wanted you all to know that I am still thinking about you, and that I should be back next week.

My little sweetie (she's 11 months old) took her first steps yesterday ... okay, it was really one step! But she did it twice, and her daddy and mommy are sooooo excited.

I hope that all of you are having a wonderful week. I did update the website last week, and put a new Scripture, recipe, and started a bonified store. There is only one product on the shelf so far, but I am working on that. I have some ideas ... let me know if you have any as well.

Praying for grace for all of us this week ...

Guest Post - The Garden of Life

I would like to introduce you to Anna Naomi who has graciously agreed to let me use her writings here. Please check out her blog, Maidens of Worth, which she shares with another sweet girl, Miriam Rebekah. I have been very blessed by the spirit of these two girls and their desire to serve the Lord!

Tuesday, December 19, 2006
The Garden of Life
*Disclaimer* Although I know that somewhere there is a book or list of different meanings for different flowers. However, I don't know them all, and the attributes I've assigned to different flowers are entirely of my own imagination.

If your life were a garden, what would be growing in it? The Bible tells us that we do indeed "plant" things in our lives. Galatians 6:7 says, "Do not be deceived; God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows." So, what are you growing in the garden of life?

Are the red roses of love growing in your garden? Love that is true, and not self-seeking? What about the white roses of purity? Are they in your life, presenting themselves clean and spotless to the world? Are the carnations of compassion flowering beautifully? Along with them, are the lilies of kindness blooming big and bright?

Walking on, would we find the daffodils of joy cheerfully making your garden a fun, joyful place? Are the pansies of peace placidly providing a calm atmosphere? Are the hyacinths of hope keeping your spirits up, while the lilacs of faith keeping your trust in God unwavering?

In the prettiest part of the garden, are the violets of gentleness doing well? And the primroses of patience, ever nearby, are they growing in depth and size? Are the daisies of grace dancing their way trough the garden, not only affecting your poise, but also helping you overlook others' faults? And the bluebells of modesty, are they blooming away, sweet, yet rarely noticed? Likewise, are the buttercups of humility helping all the other lovely flowers by protecting you from become high and haughty?

Close by, are the sunflowers of wisdom sharing their seeds and lessons learned with others? Are the peonies of prudence there as well, helping you know when to speak and when to keep silent? As a necessity to your reputation, are you tending the hydrangeas of honesty carefully? Are the chrysanthemums of justice working to make sure no one is taken advantage of, while the marigold of mercy works patiently and kindly with those who have done wrong?

No garden would be complete without the gardenias of diligence working hard to get things done. Coupled with the tulips of strength, a lot can be accomplished. Is the wisteria of endurance winding its way around, refusing to give up? What about the orchids of self-control? Are you growing those stronger and stronger?

In the center of the garden, is the goldenrod of the fear and love of the Lord shining brightly and reminding you not to compromise on His commands?

Just as it is important to plant good things in your garden, it is important to guard against the bad things that would try to grow. The devil loves to plant weeds of bitterness, envy, and srife, and send out briers of selfishness, laziness, and deceitfulness. He's always trying to find ways to plant evil little things, that would grow to wreak havoc on your garden. You must be alert, and tend your garden carefully. Pull out the weeds and cut away the briers as soon as you can, to prevent them from taking root and chocking the delicate flowers.

So, how's your garden? Is it a beautifully array of colors, spreading sweet perfume wherever you go, or is it drab and lifeless? Are you tending the garden of your life well?
posted by Anna Naomi

If you would like to read this article with its original comments, go here. If you would like to share your writings with this blog, email me at joyousmommie@girlinside.com.

Tidbits from my Journal

I am perusing my old Journals ...

I discovered a lot of quotes in them that used to help and comfort me, and I wanted to share a few with you.
Here is one I found from September 4, 2001. Read it, and feel it.
During this time I was nervous and uncertain because I was entering my last year of college and had just posted my resume online.

"Sometimes we wake feeling 'down' and we feel like that all day long for no reason that we can discover -- only it is so ... It is useless to try to feel different; trying does not touch feelings. It is useless to argue with oneself; feelings elude arguments. Be patient -- feelings are like the mists that cover the mountains in misty weather. The mists pass; the mountains abide. Turn to your Father; tell Him you know that He loves you whether you feel it or not, and that you know that He is with you whether you feel His presence or not..."

-Amy Carmichael-

The Garden of Friendship

Girl Reading a Letter at
an Open Window
Johannes Vermeer
c.1654-7

Time to water our gardens again!

One fine day, when we still lived in our second floor apartment, I waddled downstairs (I was pregnant at the time) to get the mail.

I was delighted when, amidst the bills and circulars, I found a card addressed to me! It was from a very dear friend that I do not see often. The card was beautifully handmade, and inside was a handwritten note of friendship.

The fact that my friend took the time to make me a card, and write me a letter made me feel loved. This is a wonderful way to water our friendship gardens!

Here are some letter writing hints:

1. Use nice stationary, or even make your own!

2. Use proper etiquette.

3. Think about your friend while you write, reflect on how much you care for them and why.

4. Make sure you don't go on and on about yourself! Ask questions about your friend, or perhaps recall some fun experiences that you had with your friend.

5. Write with a special pen. I love the excitement of filling a crisp, blank piece of paper with bold script!

6. Hint to your friend that you would love to receive a "real" letter in return!

I close with the words of Paul to Timothy in his loving letter:

"To Timothy, a beloved son: Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord. I thank God, whom I serve with a pure conscience, as my forefathers did, as without ceasing, I remember you in my prayers night and day, greatly desiring to see you, being mindful of your tears, that I may be filled with joy, when I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you ... " 2Timothy 1:2-5a

Two reminders!

Next week -- the website will be updated ... take a look if you remember.

In two weeks -- we will be featuring an article from a guest blogger -- this article was a blessing to me when I read it, and pray that God will use it for all of you.

Loneliness

Loneliness

You don't have to be on a desert island to feel lonely. You can be in the midst of a big group of people, and still feel all alone. You don't have to be shy to be lonely. You can be the most outgoing person in the group, and still feel isolated.

I tried to think of some situations where loneliness can weigh us down. Some of these I have experienced, and others I can't say I have. Some of these situations may be combined in your life, or they may overlap. But I hope this helps a little bit. If there is something that I haven't thought of, feel free to leave it in a comment ... or email me. I wouldn't mind doing another post on this topic if I've left things out.


1. Feeling like you don't fit into one "group" and always feeling on the fringe or outside of the group.

Have you ever stood on the edge of a crowd, just wishing that someone would turn around and include you in their conversation? Have you ever tried to find somewhere to sit, but no one would meet your eyes? These are times where you feel the blood rush to your face, and you may feel awkward and unsure of what to do.


2. Feeling that no one shares your beliefs or convictions.

We have been called as Christians to be holy. This means that we will be set apart - different - from the crowd. I remember the first six weeks of my freshman year of college. I hadn't met anyone yet, and I was a commuter student. I felt so alone. I felt like I stuck out like a sore thumb. Even though things got better after those first weeks, there was always a difference between me and the others I interacted with at school. I remember eating numerous lunches with friends, and being the only one to bow my head before the meal.


3. Moving away to a new state, town, church or school.

Have you ever been the new one at a school, church or job? These can be lonely days for anyone. It takes a while to find your niche -- where you fit in -- in your new surroundings.

4. Facing rejection from a close friend. Feeling left behind.

When friendships go stale, it can be a great time of emotional loneliness for a young women. There are also situations where a friend has not necessarily rejected you, but may be moving on in her life and you are not. Maybe she is moving away, or even getting married. If you are not, you may feel that your life isn't going anywhere, and everyone else is hitting milestones while you stay stagnant. You wonder, "When will it be my turn?"

5. Having to take a stand

When I was almost 18, I went to New Mexico as a delegate for a Junior Science Symposium. I felt like I got along very well with the other four young people that I traveled with. We had fun eating together, shopping together, and spent time talking about all sorts of things. The last night there, we attended a fancy banquet. There was a dance after the banquet, where everyone was encouraged to enjoy themselves. I knew that I wouldn't be "enjoying myself" in this way. One of the girls in my group assured me that she "didn't feel like dancing" and would stay with me. But an hour later, I was wandering around the hotel by myself. It was a time of loneliness that caused me to pray for strength. Was I the only one among hundreds that wasn't dancing? But God sent me one person that long evening that loved the Lord as well. We sat and talked for about three hours. The Lord provides, doesn't He?


6. There just isn't anyone around.
Maybe nothing drastic has happened. Perhaps there is simply no one around that you would be able to befriend! These are times when our ability to wait on the Lord is tested. We should have high standards for friendship as Christians. Good friends are hard to find.

If you are lonely, my sister-friend, you must realize several things:

1. God has not promised us lives of ease. We must go through trials in our Christian lives. Loneliness is a trial, but through this trial God is molding us and helping us to grow in Him. Maybe in some cases, God wants you to cling to your parents, and spend time with them. Your mother can be your very best friend. I learned this in my teen years. We must not waste these times in our lives griping about the fact that we are lonely. I am talking to myself too! We must cling to our Savior and meditate on His word. Here are some verses. Please meditate on these things.
Psalm 37:4
James 1: 2-4 (This is a really good one!)
I Peter 5:6-7
Ephesians 3:17-21

2. Sometimes we are lonely because of the unkindness of others. If this is so, always remember to be aware of other's feelings. Because you have felt the sting of loneliness and exclusion, you will be able to minister to others who are going through the same things. Remember to put on a bright and smiling face so that others will know that you are open to getting to know them. If you have a group at church, for example, remember to introduce yourself to new faces that may show up. Make sure that you are showing integrity in your own life. God will handle those who have misused you. Proverbs 10:9: "He who walks with integrity walks securely, but he who perverts his ways will become known."

3. Stay busy. Going through an emotional trial may cause you to draw into yourself. This is a natural response, but not one that is pleasing to God. We can find our joy in helping others and finding little ways to make them happy. The busier you are, chances are that you will not feel so lonely.

4. Don't lock yourself in to a particular age group. If God has not sent you a friend that is your age, don't forget that you don't have to base your all of your friendships on one age category. There may be younger girls just waiting to learn from you, who would be blessed if you would befriend them. There may be older women who have a lot to teach you.

5. Take it to the Lord in prayer. Always, always, ask God to send you righteous friends that will benefit you in your Christian life. We should always take our troubles to the One Who can help us. Lamentations 3:25 "The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, To the soul who seeks Him."

6. Know and take comfort in the Sovereignty of God. Our God has a plan for our lives, and will work everything out according to His timing and perfect plan. Psalm 62:5: "My soul, wait silently for God alone. For my expectation is from Him." Jeremiah 32:17: "Ah, Lord God! Behold, You have made the heavens and the earth by Your great power and outstretched arm. There is nothing too hard for You."

With much love, my sister-friends, I leave you to meditate on this post. Like I said, there may be things I have left out that you would like to hear about. You can email me at joyousmommie@girlinside.com, or just comment here or on the website. In the next couple of weeks, I'll be posting new "stuff" on the site, so remember -- I'm looking for recipes for the "Put Your Apron On" section.

The Garden of Friendship

Would your friends say this about you?


"(Fill in the blank) is a great friend. I can always count on her, and I know she cares about me."


In the weeks ahead, I'll be posting some tips on ways to water the garden of friendship. Once you've planted those initial seeds, you can't just take off and expect the garden to grow. I haven't always done as much as I could to cultivate my garden, so let's learn together!

I guess from the graphic on the top of this post, you already know that I am going to suggest that you plan a little tea party for you and a friend. The above picture shows three young women, but why not pick one friend and spend some really great quality time with her?

It doesn't have to be elaborate or expensive at all. In these modern days of blogging, IM and email, maybe we don't communicate face to face as much as we could. Believe me, I use all these forms every day in my daily life, so I'm not putting them down!

Here are five steps to get you started:

1. Pick a friend that you haven't "caught up" with lately.

2. Send her a little invitation -- in the mail :-)

3. Brew a perfect pot of tea, make sandwiches, and something sweet!

4. Start your time with prayer. Pray that your speech would be edifying to the Lord.

5. Spend some time with her, talking and listening.

Enjoy yourself! You can get as creative or simple as you like!

If you have a tea party, and happen to get some good snapshots of it (I love pictures), email them to me at joyousmommie@girlinside.com. I don't know, maybe they'll get posted!

Pleased to Meet You

I just wanted to take an opportunity to welcome you to this blog, and to introduce myself! This blog was created in correlation with The Girl Inside website.

My name is Beverly, and I have been married for 2 years and nine months (and counting!) My husband and I have a daughter who is almost ten months old as I write this. As a young woman, I was privileged to have many good examples of what a godly woman should be. I have a sister who is in her teen years, and also have the joy of knowing many others in this age category. I see how difficult it is to strive for holiness in our modern times, for we are to be set apart - different from the world.

I wanted to start The Girl Inside to create an environment for Christian young ladies who want to focus on their inner beauty. The phrase "the girl inside," refers to just this. This will be a forum for all of us to discuss whatever is true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy. If these traits sound familiar, you may be thinking of Philippians 4:8, our theme verse for The Girl Inside.

I don't want to be the only one who posts on this blog, as there are so many who have wisdom to share. I need to learn from them as well! I hope to update this blog with tidbits and articles written by others who wish to join in this endeavor.

So, nice to meet you. I would love to hear from you! What kinds of things would you like to discuss here? May God bless you.

Meditate on These Things

Welcome to The Girl Inside blog. This is the first of what I hope will be many articles. As I said in my introduction, I hope not to be the only one contributing to this blog as I have many people in mind that I will ask to share. Maybe you are one of them!

In my next few articles, I want to focus on the theme verse of The Girl Inside. I have this scripture framed and hanging in my upstairs bathroom. I love this verse because it packages so many truths into one short paragraph.

We learn in Philippians 4:8, that we are to meditate, that is, think about and internalize, things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and praiseworthy. Lets look at truth today.

Truth. Nelson's Three-in-One Bible Reference Companion defines truth as "that which is reliable, trustworthy, and consistent with the character and revelation of God."

God has been gracious to us in revealing His truth to us in His Word. Psalm 119:142 says, "Your righteousness is an everlasting righteousness, and your law is truth." Verse 160 says, "The entirety of Your word is truth, and every one of Your righteous judgements endures forever."

When we think of truth, we often think that we are telling the truth if we stay away from lying. Indeed, God wants us to be honest in all things.

But how do we meditate on things that are true, that are consistent with the Word of God?

I would like to introduce you to a girl named Carol. She is sixteen years old, and dreams about the day when she will be a bride. Her parents have told her that this is a righteous desire, as long as she does not make an idol of it. They have also told her that the wedding itself is nothing compared to the life she will spend with her future husband (if God grants her one!)

Carol has been urged to pray for her future mate, and to spend her single years focusing on the godly virtues that will make her a most excellent wife one day. One day, Carol picks up a book at the library that she absolutely can not put down. This story focuses on the world's view of love. Even though her heart is whispering to her that what she is reading goes against the truths of the Bible, she finds herself wanting to read more and more. Everything she reads is appealing to her romantic sensibilities!

Over the weeks that follow, she builds up a list of her "ideal" man, forgetting entirely that "man looks on the outward appearance, but God looks on the heart" (I Samuel 16:7.)

Thought Questions:

1. How is Carol not meditating on things that are true?

2. What harm is she doing by focusing on these novels for her ideas of romance?

3. What are ways that you meditate on things that are true? Do you have any helpful hints to share with your sister friends that may read this blog? If so, leave a comment!

4. What other traps can we fall into in this area of meditating on truth?

Thank you, my dear, younger sisters. I hope these few thoughts have been a blessing to you! Please feel free to comment, if you would like to share your thoughts on this article. I would like to reiterate that if you have a submission that you would like me to post, remembering that everything on this site must be consistent with the truths in Philippians 4:8, please contact me at joyousmommie@girlinside.com .

May God bless you!

3John: 4 "I have no greater joy than to hear my children walk in the truth."